Navigating Loss and Grief: Embracing Thinkable Patterns for Growth
Loss and grief are significant challenges that most of us will face at some point in our lives. However, there are certain thinking patterns that can help us navigate through these crises and find deeper meaning and resilience. In this article, we will explore some of these thought-provoking patterns and discuss how to implement them in our lives.
The Key to Overcoming Loss and Grief
The key to overcoming any substantial loss, crisis, or grief is to reframe the meaning of what that thing means and what life means in general. How we interpret and understand loss can greatly influence our ability to recover and find strength. Here are some beliefs we can adopt and how they can positively impact our lives.
1. Embrace Flexibility in Beliefs
Adopt a growth mindset: My beliefs don't need to be entirely true as long as they empower me to be better, give more, and do more. For example, believing that my deceased mother still exists somewhere can bring comfort. Whether or not I am certain of this belief is secondary; what matters is that it allows me to continue being a better person.
2. Perception is Reality
Life is happening for you, not to you: Instead of viewing ourselves as victims of circumstances, we can choose to see our lives as a grand strategy being played out. Understanding that our lives are revealed to us piece by piece can change our perspective on how we navigate through challenges. It is our job to figure out how to use these pieces to our advantage.
3. Comfort in Discomfort
Shakespeare's insight: “Nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so.” - William Shakespeare. We label pain and suffering as inherently “bad” because it is uncomfortable. However, to grow, we must experience pain. Just as we do in the gym, we see and feel this growth in personal and spiritual development, especially from deep loss, grief, or crisis.
4. Love in Adversity
Amor Fati: Or a love of fate. This involves not just tolerating obstacles and adversities, but seeing them as the pathway to greater beauty and joy. Seeing both the good within the bad and the bad within the good can help in accepting and even embracing what comes our way.
5. Perseverance and Resilience
Self-belief: If others have overcome these issues, we can too. This belief is known as a "growth mindset," as coined by Carol Dweck. The idea that effort and attention have a disproportionate impact on what we can change about our lives and ourselves can be incredibly empowering. We can believe that nothing about us is fixed, and we can do literally anything as long as we set our minds to it.
Implementing These Beliefs
One of the most effective strategies to integrate these beliefs is through journaling. Writing down our thoughts and rethinking negative patterns can help us catch poor thinking patterns and tangibly reframe them. This process not only aids in processing emotions but also ensures that we consistently stay on track with our beliefs.
Conclusion
Loss and grief are inevitable parts of the human experience, but they don’t have to define us. By adopting the right thinking patterns and continuously challenging our beliefs, we can navigate through these crises and find deeper meaning and resilience. Embrace the growth, find beauty in adversity, and let your love for life guide you through the toughest times.